Response to Oppression

After reading the article, “Oppression” by Marilyn Frye it really made me realize a lot of things that I could relate to life. There are different types of oppression and most of us deny it against certain type of people. They mentioned how men don’t cry and how that is the oppression against them because “it is hard to be masculine”. Men usually do not cry, and that’s the reality what we were taught, “you’re a guy don’t cry” but also men take their emotions differently than woman. They are less sensitive or take things differently, for example anger before tears. I remember this one day when I was seven years old and my great-grandfather died and I remember what I was wearing like it was yesterday. I remember my thoughts and as a child it was a scary experience. Everyone is crying around you, and you do not know how to react or comfort anyone. I remember seeing my grandparents cry and it really hit me hard. I never saw my grandfather cry, never, but that stick with me forever. In this situation men and women aren’t judged and that is interesting to see that because it is normal to be sad, it would be weirder if the people weren’t crying.

However, what happens when a girl doesn’t cry? I could definitely relate to this, it takes a lot to make me cry and sometimes I am looked upon as heartless or insensitive while meanwhile it could be killing me inside, I just wont cry it out because I can’t. I know there was a one moment in my life, where this guy betrayed me and it was hard because we’ve been together for two years, yet nobody ever saw me cry and some people judged. “ oh you don’t cry, you never cared”, I heard that several times but I do not agree with that, there are different ways that I handled the situation, not just with anger, but tears wouldn’t just come even if I wanted it to. It’s not that I didn’t care. Some people take things differently from others, and have a different response to it. For example, in a heartbroken situation most people are expected to cry and suffer while even though I was hurt I never showed it, I just started working harder in school, going to gym more, it was stress relief by doing too much things at once and it worked but some people viewed that as insensible.

I agree with this because oppression shouldn’t be happening. We are all different people and who are we to judge each other for their actions. We should stop coming to assumptions and hurt people with that. We should be more accepting to others and their opinions because we are not in their shoes. But those expectations definitely make it harder for people to succeed in life. One example of oppression in modern days is I was born in Ukraine and there the marriage and stuff work a little differently. In United States, people get married whenever they want and have kids whenever they want for many reasons “ oh she’s getting education” or “ oh she’s working hard to have a stable future”. In Ukraine and many other countries in Europe, people tend to marry at early 20s and if you aren’t married by a certain time, it is considered as “something is wrong with you”. Expectations are that a girl should be a great mother, have a great education, work, be a good housewife and many other things but at one time and if she is not successful than she is not a “ good woman”. It is interesting to see how much oppression there nowadays in the world and the reality is sad.

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